Written by: Victory Soroh

This is one of the common issues that career women deal with. If it's not rumors spread by coworkers, it's the kitchen janitors gossiping with the cooks, or even worse, it's the husbands accusing their wives in the bedroom.

On the job, women are typically more resilient, focused, patient, creative, and determined than men. Their boss interprets this behaviour as a constant willingness and readiness to put the task first. They are, by definition, containers for growth, procreation, and nurturing. In motherhood, they find themselves multi-tasking while trying to navigate through the dynamic journey of motherhood. Their ability to create, organize, and multiply most often attracts them to their managers, supervisors, and leaders.

These soft skills often influence their personalities, which makes them more admirable and visible in the workplace. Also, it could be their reliability or problem-solving traits, their high level of intelligence, or even the zeal they put into their work—going the extra mile just to seal that business deal or even closing late just to make more sales. Any of these reasons and more could draw a boss closer to a female employee.

In the office, however, these reasons are often neglected when the female staff member becomes the boss ‘favourite’. Instead of making supportive statements like "she and our boss seem to have a great working relationship," you start hearing speculative comments like "she’s going out with our boss," "I wonder if there’s more to their relationship," and "why is she getting special treatment?"

Others in the workplace may start to question her professional abilities, thinking that her success is solely due to her relationship with the boss, which can undermine her credibility, and she may struggle to maintain a healthy work-life balance if she feels the need to prove herself constantly in response to the rumors. Speculations and gossip about a female staff member may have a negative impact on her mental well-being.

To address these effects, it’s crucial for workplaces to promote a culture of professionalism, respect, and fairness. Colleagues should refrain from spreading rumors or making baseless assumptions. Eventually, everyone should be judged on their skills, performance, and qualifications rather than unfounded speculations.

In the home, it’s more emotionally taxing trying to explain to your husband that you only have a cordial and professional relationship with your boss. Lack of open communication between the career woman and her husband may lead to speculation in her home. The unending business meetings, constant calls from her boss, and working extremely late could lead to discussions and arguments with her spouse. If not properly communicated or if the wife is unable to clarify the professional context, it may further lead to misunderstandings in their marriage.

Husbands need to improve on this situation faced by women. Confronting your wife with such assumptions shows a lack of trust and support. Constantly questioning your spouse about her relationship with her boss could lead to high levels of stress and anxiety. Instead, be empathetic to her feelings and the stress she may be experiencing. Trust her professionalism and judgement. Encourage open and honest communication with your spouse. Respect her boundaries between work and her personal life. However, if speculations are causing significant strain in your marriage, consider seeking guidance from a counsellor or therapist to work through any challenges together.

Additionally, addressing workplace issues, such as managing boundaries and maintaining professionalism, can help minimize the impact of rumors on both personal and professional lives.

PS: It is pertinent to note that some women do have intimate relationships with their bosses; however, this article wasn't written for them.

Selah

Victory Soroh

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